Living your best life

Living your best life

Just yesterday, Friday, would have been the 86th birthday of Elvis Aaron Presley.

To celebrate Bea and I…well, I, watched Elvis: That’s The Way It is, a documentary concert of his 1969 Vegas concert series of performances . At 34 he was slim, mature, confident and in total control of his onstage activity. He had 8 years of his earthly life left.

This was the one to watch to remember the king.

At one point in the show he performed “Love Me Tender”, and did an impromptu walkabout, kissing lots of women and shaking hands with the guys. I roused Bea from her phone long enough to say “can you imagine that happening today?”

Her reply?

He’s just living his best life. I’d love to be able to do that.

 When I asked her to continue sharing her thoughts for my blog she wrote:

 I’ve often wanted to be a bit like Elvis, someone with a reckless charm and who could flirt with anyone who catches their eye. Someone who people swoon over and get all excited about when they see. I feel I may have left that impression on some people already, as I always try to be funny and charming upon first meeting someone. 

 Maybe I’ll never be singing on a Vegas stage in front of millions of screaming fans, but giving out a free wink and dazzling smile to anyone I pass by is just about as satisfying as walking through a crowd of people looking for a kiss (although as a pansexual I would probably be kissing the men as well as the women).

Hot damn right!


How does one live their best life? And do you only know you have after you’ve gone?

The answer? Well for me it’s all about exploration of self which is hard work until you have one of those aha moments that makes it all worthwhile. How neat that it coincided with the king’s birthday, what?

I have always defined myself in relation to others. Do you know what I mean? I am introverted like my aunt; creative like my other aunt. Sensitive, as was my mom. I look for things of others within me as a way of explaining away my behaviors.

Therefore, I cannot do this because that’s not who I am. Or because I am Bea’s mom, or a teacher, or Pat’s widow. But what if that’s just not so? Am I confusing what’s genuine feeling with a grieving checklist?

Because my aha moment from yesterday, with the help of my therapist, is that the checklist can go away now. I think I am quite well versed in it. I have checked all the boxes and created a few new ones.

I am Melissa and as my daughter so acutely recognized, it’s time to start living my best life again, with all of its joys, warts, stresses and aha moments.

What defines you? What has and does continue to shape you? Do you need to change that? What do you want? Be clear. Pay attention to your vibes. Oh, and please please watch the Love Me Tender walkabout YouTube video I have posted with the blog. It’s really not until the end, when Elvis is back up on stage that you feel “that vibe” from him. Imagine, just imagine the different turns his life might have taken if he had followed the feelings you see emanating from him during that performance.

Long live the king.


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